East side Jargon about home,family,sports,fun,and blogging

Location: T-Town, Alabama, United States

Retired enjoy bloging

Wednesday, March 31, 2004

Hi gang, hope your day has gone well. I have not herd from the Doctors office. So I am just trying to hang in there. It may be in the morning before I here from him.

One thing is for sure it is not much fun when you don’t feel good. I have not been out of the house today. Cold, yep a cold front came through after the rain. Will be in the mid thirties tonight. Did I say, winter was over? Excuse Me! The lion is taking another bite.

You here something about breast cancer every day. I had a call today from a friend whose mother-in-law has just been told she has it and the family is taking it hard.

Cancer what a brutal killer it is!

On the lighter side!

One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not
more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a "massive int ernal fart."

--Dr. Susan Steinberg, Manitoba, Canada

Thought for the day, never drought that there will be a tomorrow, somewhere.

Word for the day: guano.

Tuesday, March 30, 2004

Hi gang; has every one had a good day? I hope so. I am steal not my self but wonted to at least let you no I am thinking of all of you. M. is out of school this week. Her best friend went to Chicago for the week so she has had another friend over. You might say I am baby setting.

I hope to get to the doctor Thursday with this swimmy head. I don’t feel like doing much but sleep and eat! Ha that sounds like a normal day!

I have been thinking about the word concession a lot today. Are you aware of the ones you make each day? Made either willingly are forced to. Think about it. Do you take it for granted?

Who is going to make concessions in this household?

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the
Wedding, he laid down the following rules:

"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want- and I
Don’t expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the
Table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go
Hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old
Buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my
Rules. Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that
There will be sex here at seven o'clock every night. Whether you're
Here or not."

Thought for the day, the sun rises and sets weather I’m aware of it or not.

Word for the day: Attitude.

Monday, March 29, 2004

Hi gang I hope every one had a good Monday. What a day it has been for me! I woke up last night and have inner ear problems. I feel like someone has had my brain out playing with it.

I dare not make any sudden moves. It’s like I have been in granpas home brew. Right now that sounds like a good idea. It couldn’t be much worse.

We had another good day and could not waste it on not feeling good so…. You guest it we played golf! I made it 16 holes last two I had to suck it up. Just could not go any further! I will give it heck next week.

I received this in the e-mail today!

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so
Proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, " Mother of Six" in
Spite of her objections.

One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home
And wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts
At the top of his voice, "Shall we go home 'Mother of six?"

His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion shouts right
Back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."

Thought for the day, smile even when you’re not sure why you should.

Word for the day: dizen.

Sunday, March 28, 2004

Well here we are again gang. Another weekend has flown by. I hope all of you got to do every thing you had planed. We have had beautiful weather to do just about any thing out side but burn. It has been to dry to burn.

My main man Tiger blew another! Young Adam Scott held on to win. He worked hard all day. Another record bites the dust!

Over at Bristol, Bush did it again No. three for him at the same track. I bounced back and fourth all day. Just about wore out the remote! Two weeks till Augusta!

I wore out my cheering section Ginger liked Phil Mikelison.

Lucky liked Adam Scott!

Ginger said is it suppertime yet!

Fluff thought she would finish the puzzle!

Another hard day at Boyd creek.

Thought for the day. Some time you can have too much of a good thing!

Word for the day: Fonsdale Rally.

Saturday, March 27, 2004

Hi gang; if you’re like me you are wondering where did the day go. Well my main man Tiger is struggling! He is six back. Adam Scott from down under looks strong. He could sit a new record at Saw Grass. I love it when you get to see records sat or broken.

I think I told every one about the stray tomcat we have hanging around. That darn cat cost me a vet bill. Fluff and him got into it and she wound up with an infection.

We have to give her antibiotics twice a day far a week and then take her back to the vet. I need to get a vet lic. Seams like we are running to the vet a lot. Top it off our vet; we have had for twenty years moved to another county! New vet! I think he thinks he has struck Boyd creek gold.

Do you guys have to go to the Vet a lot?

Gang meet Mss. Fluff.

Don’t forget Nextel is running at Bristol tomorrow, up by Kat.

Thought for the day, pain is something we all have to dill with.

Word for the day: acerbate

Friday, March 26, 2004

Hi gang, that old clock is ticking down another Friday. I no you all wont to no what tiger is doing. Take a look twenty tied for 58!

T56 Nick Price 3 -2 - - 8 -2 1
T56 Loren Roberts 1 E - - 6 E 1
T56 Tiger Woods 3 -2 - - 10-2 1<<<<<<<
T56 Stuart Appleby -1 2 - - 9 2 1
T56 Darren Clarke -1 2 - - 7 2 1
T56 Jay Haas E 1 - - F 1 1
T56 Esteban Toledo -1 2 - - 12 2 1
T56 Peter Jacobsen E 1 - - F 1 1
T56 J.P. Hayes E 1 - - F 1 1
T56 Spike McRoy 2 -1 - - F -1 1
T56 Fredrik Jacobson 1 E - - 8 E 1
T56 K. J. Choi -5 6 - - 11 6 1
T56 Chad Campbell 3 -2 - - 6 -2 1
T56 Justin Rose 1 E - - F E 1
T56 Craig Perks -2 3 - - 9 3 1
T56 Pat Bates 1 E - - 11 E 1
T56 John Senden 1 E - - 6 E 1

On the cut line. Come on Tiger forget about how much the wedding is going to cost!

Hope all of you have big plains for the weekend. ENJOY!!!!

My granpa use to say son, always plain a big weekend. That way your wife can’t say I didn’t no you had something planned!

Thought for the day, have you ever noticed sometimes the harder you try the further behind you get!

Word for the day: behemoth.

Thursday, March 25, 2004

Hi gang, early post tonight. I have been watching the Players golf championship. ESPN had six and a half hours! I can here my wife now. What did you do all day! Well less see. 1. Got up at 5:30am
2. Ran to the head!
3. Went outside and got the paper.
4. Turned on coffee pot.
5. Read paper and drank coffee.
6. Went to head again.
7.ate risen hard roll and banna.
8. Watched local news at 6:30am.
9. Took med. with OJ.
10. 7:00 watched Good Morning America.
11. 8:15 took a shower.
12. 8:30 checked on you guys, made comments.
13. 10:30 watched golf espn.
14. 12:30 ate a hot dog.
15. 2:30 took a break, and checked on you guys.
16. Tiger looks like he had much rather be at home!
17. Ate some chips.
18. Big John doesn’t look too bad!
19. Took a nap.
20. 4:00pm get post done before wife comes home.

Gezz, no wonder I am so tired! I think I will go to bed early tonight.

Continuing our Doctor saga!

Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast
Table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed
Either," and storms out of the house.

After sometime he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and
Rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated
Husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?"

She says, "I was in bed."

"In bed this early, doing what?"

"Getting a second opinion!"

Thought for the day, faith has many meanings.

Word for the day: blithe.

Wednesday, March 24, 2004

Hi gang, did everyone have another exciting day. I so enjoy reading all of your blogs. Some of you worry too much about what to say or the latest joke. We have some who panic if they don’t have a picture and story to share.

Why do we find it so hard to except ourselves? Do we have to impress someone? I don’t think there is an unwritten law that states we have to blog every day and make instant wisdom! Fact is we all have our ups and downs and a mixture of in-between.

We are diverse and as such should expect differences among us. If you wont to just say hallow, fine you don’t have to write a dissertation!

Some times I just wont to here what is happening in you world. My world may be upside-down at the moment there may be a tragedy and you just wont someone to talk to. Discus a problem with someone, man we all have them.

The whole point is be your self! If you wont to be Bat Man so be it. I am sure you will find a Robin to play with.

My granpa use to say son, don’t play with the cow. You will get spoiled milk!

Three last things, this is for Desi. The first time I talked to her she was talking about the gem!

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker
Room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies
Towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then
Asked, "What's the matter haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

This is for K-motion, stick drawing in word. Self Portrait.

Buttercup, Dorthy, Love both Harleys, Maybe my wife will let me have this one!

Thought for the day, it is your choice to be or not to be!

Word for the day: impudence.

Tuesday, March 23, 2004

Hi gang, I am running behind today. We played golf! I no it’s a terrible thing to do but the weather was just too nice to stay home and work in the yard. I no you wont to know. I lost two and found two! What a day!

I am still trying to find my paint program to do a self-portrait. I don’t know if it was Wanda that started this or Phyllis. Any way join the fun.

Also g-spot wont a picture of your rear end. This is for zoo. I no you wont to get in on this one! Hum…

I had one rear end shot to share. I was a little then back then, but flying high. This should get me first prize.

Keep on smiling!

Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding

The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that
Reads, 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever.'

"Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that
Reads, "Here Lies My Husband Stiff At Last.'"

Thought for the day, never let it be said that we did not try!

Word for the day: ingénue.

Monday, March 22, 2004

Hi gang, I lost my post again tonight! I transferd it to China I guess. Any way I trust every one had a good Monday. My granpa use to say son the only good thing about Monday is you get two days to rest up for it!

I noticed a lot of new sight looks going on. They all look good. I don’t dare touch any thing! It will dissaper! I seem to be quite good at that. I have enough trouble now!

Speaking of trouble!

True Doctor Stories :-)

A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!"
I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs, and I was in the wrong one.

--Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Antonio, TX

Thought for the day, most never stop to smell the roses or check the cab!

Word for the day: guff.

Sunday, March 21, 2004

Hi gang, I am so sore from digging! Life is grand when you have something to complain about. How about this weather? 85* yesterday 50* today, freeze to night.
My granpa use to say son, always find something to complain about. Keeps every one on their toes!
I ran across this today. A little long but a good read.

One day, when I was a freshman in high school,
I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.
His name was Kyle.
It looked like he was carrying all of his books.

I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books
On a Friday?
He must really be a nerd."
I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with
my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.

As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him.
They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and
tripping him so he landed in the dirt.
His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about
ten feet from him.

He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.
My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he
crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.
As I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks.
They really should get lives. " He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!"

There was a big smile on his face.
It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.
I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.
As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had
never seen him before.

He said he had gone to private school before now.
I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.
He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.

I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends.
He said yes. We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the
more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of
books again. I stopped him and said, "Boy, you are gonna really build some
serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!
" He just laughed and handed me half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.
When we were seniors, we began to think about college.

Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I was going to Duke.
I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would
never be a problem.He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for business on a
football scholarship. Kyle was valedictorian of our class.
I teased him all the time about being a nerd.
He had to prepare a speech for graduation.
I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.
Graduation day, I saw Kyle He looked great.

He was one of those guys that really found himself during high
school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.
He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him.
Boy, sometimes I was jealous. Today was one of those days
I could see that he was nervous about his speech.
So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy, you'll be
great!" He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful
one) and smiled.

"Thanks," he said.
As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began.
"Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it
through those tough years.Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but
mostly your friends... I am here to tell all of you that being a
friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.

I am going to tell you a story."I just looked at my friend with disbelief
as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend.
He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom
wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.
He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.
"Thankfully, I was saved.My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable."
I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular
boy told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same
grateful smile.Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions.
With one small gesture you can change a person's life.
For better or for worse. God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in
some way.

Thought for the day. A friend is like having an extra pair of eyes. They see things you don’t.

Word for the day: felicity.

Saturday, March 20, 2004

Hi gang, summer rules are here! I had to cut grass again today. Second tome. That done and I dug up a privet hedge root. The roots go to China! I made a pic. to show you.

How many of you have dug up privet before? Boz put down your hand. Watching your mom, does not count. I have a little hill side I wont to clear off. There has got to be an easer way! I am thinking explosives!

No boz I don’t have a bulldozer. Not a bad idea though!

I didn’t get all the roots they go everywhere!

I have all these to go!

Thought for the day, there is always something to do.

Word for the day: hyoid.

Friday, March 19, 2004

Hi gang, I am ahead of the game today and thought I would post early. Truth is old Author is acting up. We are a mess today. My wife stayed home with bad cold and I am hurting quite a bit. For me that usually means a weather change.

Nice way to start a weekend! Oh well ever day is a week- end for me, so I can’t complain. Or can I, hum…….!

Remember when!

Thought for the day, don’t wait for someone to ask you to love them.

Word for the day: bruiser.

Thursday, March 18, 2004

Hi gang, I guess I took a break today, because I did nothing but clean the kitchen. Yet where did the day go?

I forgot to tell you that, we won the Spring Invitational last week end. Jacksonville State was second and Kentucky third. Tiger is in the hunt at Bay Hill. What about my main man Jr. How sweet it is to see him running so good!

I am keeping it short tonight so I can show you some clips I took of the work I have been doing out back.

First, four of eight piles to be burned.

Looking along side of the house, we raked and burned.

Last is for the ladies. This is a out side vine, something grew in it?

Thought for the day, dream a little dream with me.

Word for the day: heteronym.

Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Hi gang, you are sooo lucky you get two posts today. For some strange reason my 56k does not work if my phone is not working! We were with out phone service from around two yesterday until six this morning. To my grand daughter the world ended! She went to the phone every five minutes.

Today was my three-month check up at the Doctors. My granpa loved his comment; when he said well Joe you have doubled your bottom line! I said that’s good. He said it might be good if we were talking finance. I am talking blood pressure!

You need more exercise! Why not get a part time job. Loose about twenty pounds. Stop messing around with your med. Hold up I said, I’m trying to remember all this. He said that wouldn’t be a problem. I ‘m writing it down so your wife can read it!

Now you have never herd any one say I TOLD YOU SO, like my wife can say it. It seems to echo for hours!

Thought for the day, if an apple a day keeps the doctor away why does he keep giving me all these pills?

Word for the day: blunderbuss.

Hi gang, the rain moved out this morning so I was able to get out and cut some wood. Still to wet to do any thing else. Very windy this afternoon, I love to here the wind in the trees. I sat on the back deck for a while enjoying the worm sun and the wind in the trees. Life is good I thought.

Sure I have health problems but few people my age don’t. I am truly blessed to be able to do some of the things I do. Like still playing golf. I am going to play as long as I can swing a club. I no a man at our golf club, Mr. Wilson is his name. He is 90 years young! He still walking, puling a cart. You should see him hit a ball! Someone said you are only as old as you feel. That being true, I am 25!

Thanks for stopping by. Make sure you see my Golden Egg award in the right column. The next one could be yours!

I will close with a fair joke I ran across. This one will make all the ladies through their mouse at me!

A husband walks into Frederick's of Hollywood to
Purchase some sheer lingerie for his wife. - He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to
$500 in prices, the more sheerly, the higher the price.
He opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500 and
Takes the lingerie home. He presents it to his wife
And asks her to go upstairs, put it on and model it for him.
Upstairs, the wife thinks, "I have an idea. It's so
Sheer that it might as well be nothing. I'll not put it on, do the modeling naked and return it the next day and get a $500 refund for myself. So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose. The husband says, "Good Lord! You'd think that for $500, they'd at least iron it!"

' Funeral Services are pending'.

Thought for the day, what goes up must come down, getting there lays the fun.

Word for the day: fortuitous.

This is yesterdays post my phone has been out!

My granpa use to say son if they can’t here you. Wait to you get closer, and use sign language!

Monday, March 15, 2004

PS Hi gang, look what we won! Your talking to the President of the priestesses golden goose egg club. As the first recipient I would like to thank Goose for founding this outstanding and highly sought after Bloging award.

Next I would like to thank my Granpa, whose direction skills have reached the height and depth of Boyd Creek.

All the lovely ladies that make me blush every day with their kind comments.

I can not for get the three pace setters who have led me by the hand through Blogville. I wont name names but your description will let every one no who you are. First, the Midget who has bent over backwards to help in every way! Second, the hippo who scarlery writing has inspired me to excel! Last but not least the giant among blogers every where, who inspired me to drool at pictures of people I have never herd of. Whose dedication and sleepless nights trainees me to be the best! What can I say, he achieved his goal!

To all my stead fast friends in blogville, the best fans a star could have! Thank you!


Our CEO Goose and I will keep you up to date. Prepair now to be the next victem!

Hi gang. Rainey day is not going to get me down. I have read my comments; eat breakfast, read a few blogs. Eat lunch, read a couple chapters in two towers, eat a snack. Oh, and did I tell you I’m trying to lose weight!

I can’t believe some of you are still having snow! Please keep it up that way. I no, I no… it’s tough but someone has got to put up with it. You live where you live because that’s where you live! Now doesn’t that make you feel better?

My granpa use to say son, if you don’t have much to say, then shut up so I can say something!

How-wa-e How wa e Fun in How-wa-e

Two priests decided to go to Hawaii on vacation. They were determined to
make this a real vacation by not wearing anything that would identify them
as clergy. As soon as the plane landed, they headed for a store and bought
some really outrageous shorts, shirts, sandals, sunglasses, etc.

The next morning, they went to the beach, dressed in their "tourist" garb.
They were sitting on beach chairs, enjoying a drink, the sunshine and the
scenery when a "drop dead gorgeous" topless blonde in a thong bikini came
walking straight towards them. They couldn't help but stare. As the blonde
passed them, she smiled and said "Good morning, Father, good morning,
Father," nodding and addressing each of them then passed on by. They were
both stunned. How in the world did she know they were priests?

So the next day, they went back to the store and bought even more outrageous
outfits. These were so loud you could hear them before you even saw them.
Once again the two priests (incognito) settled on the beach, in their chairs
to enjoy the sunshine. After a while, the same gorgeous topless blonde,
wearing a string bikini, taking her sweet time, came walking toward them.
Again she nodded at each of them, said "Good morning, Father, " and started
to walk away. One of the priests couldn't stand it any longer and said.

"Just a minute young lady."

"Yes? She replied.

"We are priests, and proud of it, but I have to know, how in he world did
you know we are priests, dressed as we are?"

"Father, it's me, Sister Mary Francis," she replied.

Thought for the day, bring sunshine to a cloudy day.

Word for the day: altruism.

Sunday, March 14, 2004

Hi gang we'r talking taters here! Have a good evening.

Well, Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other, and
finally they got married, and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam.'
course, they wanted the best for Yam. When it was time, they told her about the facts of life. They
warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get
accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for herself like 'Hot Potato,' and end up witha bunch of Tater Tots. Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her! But on the other hand she wouldn't
stayhome and become a Couch Potato. She would get plenty of exercise so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring cousins.

When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out for the hard-boiled guys from Ireland. And the greasy guys from France called
the French Fries. And when she went out west, to watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped.

Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate with those high class Yukon Golds, or the ones from the otherside of the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks that say, 'Frito Lay.'

Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (that's Potato
University) so that when she graduated she'd really be in the Chips. But in spite of
allthey did for her, one-day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Tom Brokaw.
Tom Brokaw! Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset. They told Yam she couldn't possibly marry Tom Brokaw because he's

Are you ready for this? .............................

Are you sure?............................

OK! Here it is!

............................... A COMMON TATER !!

Thought for the day, life is what you make it.

Word for the day: dialysis

Saturday, March 13, 2004

Hi gang, what a day! My wife and I cleaned and burned on the side of the house all day, about a half acre of limbs and leaves. We are ahead of schedule, normally it’s April when we do this.

Terrorist! Why can’t we find them before they murder someone? Killing in the name of someone is also stupid. However, we have done it for thousands of years. It use to be, I am going to save you, if I have to kill you to do it! Now it’s I am going to kill you to save you!

If I had all the answers I would not be here talking to you to night. I have read the lives of men and women, who have asked the same kind of questions for centuries.

The French philosopher Descartes said, “I think therefore I am,” and we believe him. Is that all there is my friend! Is this the definition of human existence? Hum…. Think about it.

Well call me rambling Rose tonight. We are all sick of hearing of our brother and sisters murdered by Terrorist!

Thought for the day, am I my brother’s keeper?

Word for the day: velocipede

Friday, March 12, 2004

Hi gang this is my second post tonight. The first diapered! I am not going to get mad, I’m not,@~%*+%$@!

I feel better now. Have not heard from Shelley about Megan. They went up to her middle daughters for the weekend.

I have fourteen trees cut up to be burned. It has been too windy to even think about burning.

One of my golf buddies and I went out to our golf course and watched the start of a collage match up. Thirteen teams!
2004 Conrad Rehling Spring Invitational

Jacksonville State
Georgia State
Michigan State
North Florida
Notre Dame
Kent State
Ole Miss
Mississippi State
These young men can hit the ball a mile! I hope to get back out for the finals Sunday.
Thought for the day, new wine taste sweet to the tong, but bitter to the brain.
Word for the day: insulin.

Thursday, March 11, 2004

Hi gang, hope every one had a good day. I am back swinging an axe. I have got to get all the trees cut up for burning. Made a dent in it today. Should be able to finish in about three days.

Magen is home from school again today. Tomorrow we are
Taking her to the doctor. She has not been able to keep much food down all week.

I ran across a good one for all the beer drinkers out there. Ladies don’t look!


A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on
the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts."
She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer.
When he finished it, he said, "Quick, bring me another beer. It's
gonna start." This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer. When it was gone, he said, "Quick, another beer before it starts."

"That's it! She blows her top, "You bxstard! You waltz in here, flop
your fat asx down, don't even say hello to me and then expect me to run around likeyour slave. Don't you realize that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day
The husband sighed. "Oh shxt, it's started."

Thought for the day, mercy means nothing to a murderer.

Word for the day: coxcomb.

Wednesday, March 10, 2004

Hi gang! I am running late tonight. All the fresh air I’ve had to day, working in the garden has taken its toile. I am so sleepy. I can hardly stay awake. The ground has been cleared of weeds, turned and raked. It’s ready to be planted.

I went over to Home Depot to check out their plants, and they had very little to offer. Tomorrow I will go to Lows and see what they have. The ground has been prepared for three rows of plants. Tall red plants in the rear. Medium white in the middle, with multi-color in front. This year I may plant a small garden under the front bay window. Either that or some small shrubs.

Today has gone by so quick! I don’t know how the farmers do it. The feel of the soil is so therapeutic. Makes you feel like there is not a care in the world to pull you down. You can forget about all the pains and ills of the world, and clear your mind for a while.

I had to keep Megan home again today. Tomorrow, she needs to get back in school. By then the bug she has should be gone.

Dorothy told me the other day, to get me a Harley. I told her they are too expensive. Today I found me a bike! I don’t like the model but it’s a start, the instructor comes with the bike. I posted a picture for your evaluation.
My granpa use to say son, riding a motorcycle is like warring a sign that says please hit me!

Thought for the day, basically there are two kinds of people, you and me.

Word for the day: eolithic.

Tuesday, March 09, 2004

Hi gang, it has turned cold again! The wind has been howling all day. I just picked up all the broken limbs, and now I have got to start over again. I think we still have some cold weather to deal with. Sure don’t like to say that.

I no you can’t wait to here how many golf balls I lost. Ready! Zip, nada, is that not great? The truth is I did not get to play today. I had to keep Megan home from school today. She has the stomach flu.

My granpa use to say son, if you don’t get to do the things you wont to do, it gives you the opportunity to do the things you can do better!

How many out there wont to here a good blond joke? Less see there’s 1-2-3-4-boz do you have your hand up or are you talking? All you beautiful blonds out there forgive me. However this is educational so pay attention.

A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage. A blonde came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten.

We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?"

She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one.."

She replied that she did not know exactly what it was, but this piece had always been there.

The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like.

She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote

He then took her over to another car which had its hood up and asked "is there a 710 on this car?"

She pointed and said, "Of course, its right there."

If you're not sure what a 710 is Scroll down.............

Thought for the day, short fuse is handled with lots of hugs.

Word for the day, davit.

Monday, March 08, 2004

Hi gang, I have had one of those days, where you say where did it go? I am tired, but it seems like I just got up. I have been Megan’s driver today. Too and from school, and we just got in from baton practice!

I worked in the back forty again today. I have trees down all over. After picking Megan up I weeded in the flower garden for an hour or so. I wont to get some plants in. It looks so bare in front of the house.

I did get around and read a few blogs this morning. I ran across a couple that was professional! It was like reading from a book. I also listen to Kats voice blog. It sounded just like I had her pictured in my mind.

Tomorrow is our golf outing, if I can rest up tonight. It is a tough job, but some one has to do it! Can I go two rounds with out a lost ball? You will just have to check back to see.

My granpa use to say son, working in the back forty tired, is like rocking a cradle. You no you should have gone to sleep that night!

Thought for the day, relaxing after a hard days work is one of the best feelings in the world.

Word for the day, tonicity

Sunday, March 07, 2004

Hi gang, I hope every one is enjoying the rest of their weekend. Supper last night was good as usual. Another couple joined us because the place was packed. So we had three couples.

We spent this afternoon with my mother-in-law. Her birthday is Tuesday but we got together today. She will be 87. I could not ask for a better mother-in-law! Again I ate too much! Oh yea of little will power. I am keeping the post short so my wife can do one of the girl’s income taxes. I wont to share this I ran across. I always say something about my granpa. This is about a great, great, great granma. It’s a little long but I think most will enjoy it. For those who don’t I owe you one?

One summer, my small country
town announced it would host
a farmers market every Saturday
on Main Street. Local gardeners were
encouraged to bring produce so they
could profit from their labors.
How exciting! I thought as I eyed my
flourishing raspberry patch.
I called my mom with the thrilling
news of my business venture and told
my three daughters. They rallied me on,
offering to help however they could.
The day before my farmers market
debut, I picked berries.. .and more
berries.., and still more berries. It was
an exceptionally hot summer day and
my shoulders burned. Small scratches
covered my arms and legs from the tall,
thorny branches.
I kept at it for hours, carefully pick-
ing my cash crop so I wouldn’t smash or
bruise them. I stacked them gently in
neatly packaged containers. This is go-
ing to be terrific, I kept telling myself.
An Uneasy Feeling
As the sun set that night and the air
cooled, I sat exhausted in the grass and
gazed at my raspberry patch. Something
wasn’t right.
I stroked our faithful old golden re-
triever and thought of warm July days of
summers before. I recalled picking the
raspberries, and the pleasure it brought
to share them.
Funny.. .before today, I couldn’t re-
call feeling the heat of the burning sun
nor the sting of a raspberry branch
scraping my bare skin. For as long as I
could remember, I’d given berries to my
When I recalled the wonderful feel-
ing that went hand in hand with giving,
I remembered something my great-
grandmother used to say: “When you
give away one loaf of bread, you get
back two—and I don’t mean bread,
Passing on the Message
She spoke those gentle words of wis-
dom to my grandmother, who repeated
them to my mother, and she in turn ten-
derly spoke them to me. This wise ex-
pression simply means that by giving of
ourselves, we are rewarded twofold.
Later that night I made a telephone
“Good evening,” my mom answered
“I can’t do it,” I moaned.

“Can’t do what?” she asked.
“The raspberries, Mom. I can’t sell
“Ah,” she sighed. “You mean, when
you give away one loaf of bread, you get
back two?”
“Exactly,” I said, relieved that she
I hung up and went to break the news
to my daughters, who were eagerly an-
ticipating our sale the next morning.
“There will be a slight change in
plans,” I told them. “Be ready to deliv-
er the raspberries in the morning to
friends, but we won’t be selling them.”
“Oh, Mom!” they cried. “Why not?”
“Well, like your great-great-grand-
mother used to say, ‘When you give
away one loaf of bread you get back two
—and I don’t mean bread, honey.’”

Thought for the day, There was no sweeter hug in all the world like mygrama.

Word for the day, clodhopper.

Saturday, March 06, 2004

Hi gang I hope you are enjoying your Saturday. I am worn out again. I spent four hours in the back forty cutting trees. My chainsaw messed up so the last seven or eight I cut by hand. You wont to find out how out of shape you are swing an axe.

We are going out to supper to night. Supposing I can crewel to the car! Don't think I will do the hat dance to night, all though you never no. I had to laugh at marci talking about the girl in the short mini skirt. It is amazing guys watch girls and girls watch girls.

How many have been over to boz to see his new camera? Check it out, another blue light special. I bet he traded a watch for it!

Another note, you got to go over to Retro girls place and say congrad. On her son finely finding a car! If you find you have surfed out, go over to Faiths and see how much time has passed sense she had a drink. Let her no you are pulling for her!

Thought for the day, listen to the wind in the trees, you will find peace.

Word for the day, kipper.

Friday, March 05, 2004

We have done it again! Another Friday bites the dust. I hope every one had a good one. Rain came in early so I didn’t get to finish my out side work. Spent a lot of time just blog surfing. I ran across one blog that had a male come on ring to it so dumb me, I went in to check it out. It was a 19-year-old student. Who said she used the name to surprise men, boys, guys and that other side of the fence girls, when they found out who she was. Her blog went on to list the cases of first time offenders who were trying to entice teenagers over the net. They were caught and she listed their jail sentence. She has 36,960 hits on her sight! First year freshman collage student. I could almost hear her laughing at every stupid man in the world who falls for her crap!

Any way this goes along with what I was going to share with you to prove a point.

This has got to be one of the best singles ads ever printed.

It appeared in the Atlanta Journal.
Companion Wanted:

seeks companionship, ethnicity unimportant.

I am a very good looking girl who LOVES to play. I love
long walks in the woods, riding in your pick-up truck, hunting,
camping, fishing trips, and cozy winter nights lying by the fire.
Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hands.
I'll be at the front door when you get home from work,
wearing only what nature gave me. Kiss me and I'm yours.

Call (404) 875-6429 and ask for Daisy.

Over 15,000 men found themselves talking to the Atlanta Humane Society about an 8-week-old Black Labrador Retriever.

Thought for the day, the other side of the fence is never as green as you thought.

Word for the day, intrigue.

Thursday, March 04, 2004

Star Date 3059’

Hi gang this is for all Star Track fans. My son owns a Harley Soft Tail that I don’t know how to ride and my wife says I have enough problems! ‘Sigh’ my mom would not let me have a motorcycle either. Maybe something like this little jewel. Second thought it may cost more than a Harley.

Worm weather again today. I wore my self out cutting trees! My chain saw gets heavy quick! I got seventeen cut and had to quit. I am weeding out a lot of three to four inch huckleberry trees. I would not make a good logger.

Rain is coming back in tomorrow. I wont to get so more cut in the morning. Maybe I can get to my garden in the afternoon.

Thanks to boz and marci I got the sight working right again. Well almost. Yahoo still does not have my pictures and e-mail working. I will give them until the first of the week, then I am moving!

Two of the great-grand children are spending the night. That means picture time! We have one of the twins Robert. Stash got something in his eye and had to go to eye doctor. We will see him tomorrow.

My granpa use to say son, grandkids are to show you all the mistakes you made with your kids, great-grand kids show you that have out grown your sense of hummer!

Thought for the day, work as though today may be your last.

Word for the day, woolsack.

Wednesday, March 03, 2004

I hope all of you had a great day like I did! 75* my kind of weather. Got the tractor up and running. It sure was dirty from sating up all winter. I got the grass mulched, picked up leaves along front fence and trimmed one bush not bad for half days work.

I saw two butterflies, yellow and blue. We have yellow butterflies until some time November. They are beautiful I plant flowers to attract them. Last year was a banner year. They love red snapdragons. I may get started on my garden tomorrow, not sure yet. We may get one more day before the rain moves back in.

With nice weather coming back in I need to get back to walking and exercising! I am starting to have trouble buttoning my pants! I use to work out every day, now just play golf. Not good! Working out side helps some, but not enough.

Well gang what is going on! I scanned through you guys this morning and again this afternoon not much happening. I suppose we all need a break from time to time. I love it when someone says I have nothing and then write two pages! There are some good jokes at Dorothy’s. Should get a laugh out of you. They are all my lines by the way!

Thought for the day, find you place of wonderment.

Word for the day, ectoderm.

Tuesday, March 02, 2004

“Me and my shadow walking down the avenue”

This is my shadow. Her name is Ginger, but I call her fuzzy face. She is one spoiled little girl. There are not many places I go that she is not with me. Smart, she knows the difference between a going somewhere move and just moving through the house. To her the word go means car!

We have talked how much we get attached to our pets. To me I don’t own them they possess me. They love you unconditionally! Asking very little in return.

I love to watch them play. Some times they get mad if bitten to hard and man that let them no about it right away. They run and play like little children. They are the first to greet you if you have been gone. Jumping and barking, I missed you!

My home would be boring with out them to cheer me up every day. They are the first I see in the morning and the last I see a night. Some times I feel they can read my mind. They will react to something with me only thinking about it.

My granpa use to say son, take care of them critters, and you will always have love to share with others!

Thought for the day, have you scratched you critter behind the ear today?

Word for the day, decumbent.

Monday, March 01, 2004

Now that the bozies are over and and all I got was an honorable mention. I sat in the rain all day at Boyd creek sulking! I am just to broken up to talk to any one but merci, belle, Kate, Melissa, Kim, Dorothy, Dessrie, Rachel, sister, Phyllis, Maggie, Faith, Miline, Becky, Ann, Heather! Did I forget any one? I am so dislocated from blogdom.

My granpa use to say son, it's not a mater of weather you win or loose, but did you step in some ones face!

Thought for the day, always chose the best, second best is not much fun.

Word for the day, Henbane--submitted by Goose!