East side Jargon about home,family,sports,fun,and blogging

Location: T-Town, Alabama, United States

Retired enjoy bloging

Thursday, March 30, 2006

"It happens Every Spring"

We've been meaning to sit you down for a frank discussion of you-know-what for a while. You've probably picked up a thing or two at the playground, but something was likely lost in the translation. Anyway, we think you're finally old enough to hear the truth...

Several sources give credit to the great Cole Porter for coining the phrase. One of the legendary musicians more famous songs was "Let's Do It." The 1928 standard contains the lyrics:

Birds do it, bees do it
Even educated fleas do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love

World Wide Words goes on to explain that the first "explicit use of the phrase" didn't occur until 1939. An article on filmmaking from the Freeport Journal Standard stated: "A Frenchman was born sophisticated: he knows about the birds and the bees." Hey, hey -- vive la France!

The Straight Dope believes poet Samuel Coleridge was the likely originator. His poem, the cheerfully titled "Work Without Hope," opens with:

All Nature seems at work. Slugs leave their lair--
The bees are stirring--birds are on the wing--

In other words, when the birds start moving and the bees start grooving, it's on like Donkey Kong.

While there's no real consensus on how the term came about, most folks cite Mr. Porter.

There is just something in our genes that take on new meaning every spring.
The bright colors.
Warm sun.
Migrating birds.
Beautiful butterflies.
multicultural flowers.
A sense of a renewal.

My grandpa use to say son, spring time is Mother Natures way of saying I Love You!

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

"New Star in Heaven"

I’m Glad I’m Me
by Phil Bolsta

I don’t understand why everyone stares
When I take off my clothes and dance down the stairs.
Or when I stick carrots in both of my ears,
Then dye my hair green and go shopping at Sears.
I just love to dress up and do goofy things.
If I were an angel, I’d tie-dye my wings!

Why can’t folks accept me the way that I am?
So what if I’m different and don’t act like them?
I’m not going to change and be someone I’m not.
I like who I am, and I’m all that I’ve got.
@1991 Phil Bolsta

Cassidy, is such a heart wrenching story. As I read the news this morning of the bombing in Irack, Alabama prison overcrowding and budget. My mind kept coming back to this bright eyed little girl. We're not promased a tomorrow! Life is so frigiel and yet so many choose to just throw it away.

My prayer today is for Cassidy and her family, may the pain of her passing awaken in all of us a new desire to be better, try harder, and place our lives in the Fathers hands always!

Monday, March 27, 2006

Busy Weekend

We had the twins and their sister this weekend. First time in over a month. Their mother came by for about ten minutes. What a joke! If I had my way she wouldn't see them at all! The only and best thing I can do for her is pray for her. She is running foot loose and wild one drug high to the next.

The kids all have bad colds, about what you can expect for this crazy weather we are having. Hot one day and cold the next. My grandpa use to call it an intercourse with nature! LOL!

Saturday I cut grass at the church for the first time this year. Yesterday my son cut at the lake while my grandson and I played golf. It was windy and cold all day. I guess I don't have to tell you Tiger lost by fifteen strokes! As he said. That's golf! Not much else you can say. Ames was KING of the hill! I haven't seen better in a while!

Friday, March 24, 2006

"Seance from the Zoo"

Patches, the kitten some one dropped off by us had her liter a week old today. Five two have a bob tail both male. The mother has an infection and my daughter is feeding them every four hours.

Right now we have ten cats and six dogs! The pet food industry love me almost as much as my Vet! My son has a dog, daughter has a dog, granddaughter has a cat and a dog. My wife and I have three dogs. We have three adult cats that stay outside and only show up to eat. They have been with us far about five years now.

It's a good thing we live in the country. I am thankful we have a large place for all to enjoy them selves. Each one is a mess, all are like little children, spoiled rotten! I would like to keep the two bob tail kittens but my wife is throwing a fit sooooooo I will just have to wait and see.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

"How to Spend Your Incom Tax"

Image hosting by Photobucket
Image hosting by Photobucket
Image hosting by Photobucket
Image hosting by Photobucket
Image hosting by Photobucket
Image hosting by Photobucket
Image hosting by Photobucket
This is a project we have put off for years but after Katrina coast us so much that our insurance wouldn't cover, we thought this tree trimming had to be done. What a job. So far eight full pick-up loads of wood have been given away.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Things we should do.

A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package:

"This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package."

He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.

"She got this the first time we went to New York , 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on, was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died. He turned to me and said:

"Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion".

I still think those words changed my life.

Now I read more and clean less.

I sit on the porch without worrying about anything.

I spend more time with my family, and less at work.

I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every day... I will wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like it.

I do not save my special perfume for special occasions; I use it whenever I want to. The words "Someday..." and "One Day..." Are fading away from my dictionary. If it is worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now. I do not know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she would not be there the next morning, this nobody can tell. I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends.

She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I would li ke to think she would go out for Chinese, her favorite food. It is these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come.

I would regret it, because I would no longer see the friends I would meet, letters... that I wanted to write

"One of these days".

I would regret and feel sad, because I did not say to my brother and sisters, son and daughters, not times enough at least, how much

I love them.

Now, I try not to delay, postpone or keep anything that could bring laughter and joy into our lives...
Moreover, on each morning, I say to myself that this could be a special day..

Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.

If you got this, it is because someone cares for you and because, probably, there is someone you care about.

If you are too busy to send this out to other people and you say to yourself that you will send it "One of these days", remember that "One day" is far away... or might never come...

I received this via e-mail and just about sumes up where I am in my life right now. Most of you are parably thinking of me and the flu bug and how long it has been sense I have posted on my blog.

I am starting to come around but much slower than I have ever kicked a bug before. The flu coupled with the acid reflux problem and my existing condition has taken its toll on me.

My mind is not clear and my tremors are worse. Sunday I had a paralyses draw up my right hand and it took several minutes of strong messaging to get it to straighten out. This has left my right arm sore and numb from the elbow down. I have also developed a nerves twitch in my face that comes and goes.

I go back to the doctor next week and hope by then to be feeling better and responding better. Right nown I just want to melt away but my desire to fight is much to strong. So my friends the few that do drop by, thank you for you're prayers and thoughts and hang with me as I try to work this out.

My grandpa use to say son, never give up because the going got tuff, suck it up and give am more than they bargained for!

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

"I must have struck a nerve"

My last post sure got raving comments! LOL!

Oh well all is fair in love and war so they say! Any way my son brought home a flu bug and my daughter and I have picked it up. To say I don't feel well wouldn't be the truth,I don't think I'm alive! Only a dead person could feel this bad! LOL! Oh, it hurt to say that!

Golf vs. Sex

A golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a couple of strokes. "Boy, I'd give anything to sink this putt," the golfer mumbles to himself. Just then, a stranger walks up beside him and whispers, "Would you be willing to give up one-fourth of your sex life?"

Thinking the man is crazy and his answer will be meaningless, the golfer also feels that maybe this is a good omen so he says, "Sure," and sinks the putt.

Two holes later, he mumbles to himself again, "Gee, I sure would like to get an eagle on this one." The same stranger is at his side again and whispers, "Would it be worth giving up another fourth of your sex life?"

Shrugging, the golfer replies, "Okay." And he makes an eagle.

On the final hole, the golfer needs another eagle to win. Without waiting for him to say anything, the stranger quickly moves to his side and says, "Would winning this match be worth giving up the rest of your sex life?"

"Definitely," the golfer replies, and he makes the eagle.

As the golfer is walking to the club house, the stranger walks alongside him and says, "I haven't really been fair with you because you don't know who I am. I'm the devil, and from this day forward you will have no sex life."

"Nice to meet you," the golfer replies, "I'm Father O'Malley."

Monday, March 13, 2006

Paid to blog

Morning all. Yesterday was another blur in my life. It went by so fast that I scratch my head in wander! Where did it go? Sunday has become a family gathering for brunch. Normally my son and wife do all the cooking, but he has a flu bug and I stepped up to the plate!

Cooking is nothing new to me, being an old short order fast paced breakfast cook in Chicago many years ago. I use to love to cook and joke with our clientele. Any way after brunch my grandson and I played golf at the lake, then went to his moms for supper.

My daughter made my favorite, meatloaf, buterbeans, cornbread, potatoes, cucumber salad with onions! We dogie, did I pig out! My diet went out the window. LOL!
We watched the end of the Honda golf classic and got back home around six. We were both so full we couldn't eat desert so we got a dogie bag of chalks cake.

After Desperate House wives I hit the sack and was asleep in thirty seconds!

I ran across a article sbout bloging that I thought you might be interested in. The place is Austin TX. I always look at any thing from that area because of David, our bloging friend who lives there. Any way one of the bloger names stood out for me because I use to read her daily bloging. Dooce! Some of you may have read her blog.

When I first started bloging I went to her sight. It was like a soap opera. Little did I no that that is exactly what it was and she was getting paid by Adcents to blog! The sight was funny, well written and I assumed a running account of a girl and her husband living out side their religious family circle in Utah. Any way you can't comment on her sight but you could send e-mail, which I did on occasion. I stayed with her until her first child was born yap blow by blow pic. of her pregnancy.

After the birth of their little girl I became bored with her and wanted more than a one sided accout of bloging. I had no idea she was doing her blog as a full time job! LOL! She must have done well because she has readers around the world who hang by every word! She has became another "Days of Our Lives" in the blog world.

I have another one listed on my sight now who is doing the same thing for pay but I'm aware of it and go to her sight more as a teaching than any thig. This girl is sharp as a tack! I let you see if you no who I am talking about. She is listed in my blog roll.

Hear is the sights I ran across if you would like to read them. Gives you a little of what's out there in blogsville!

Sunday, March 12, 2006

" That they may have Eyes but not see and Ears but not hear"

The Transfiguration of Christ is the culminating point of His public life, as His Baptism is its starting point, and His Ascension its end. Moreover, this glorious event has been related in detail by St. Matthew (17:1-6), St. Mark (9:1-8), and St. Luke (9:28-36), while St. Peter (2 Peter 1:16-18) and St. John (1:14), two of the privileged witnesses, make allusion to it.

About a week after His sojourn in Cæsarea Philippi, Jesus took with him Peter and James and John and led them to a high mountain apart, where He was transfigured before their ravished eyes. St. Matthew and St. Mark express this phenomenon by the word metemorphothe, which the Vulgate renders transfiguratus est. The Synoptics explain the true meaning of the word by adding "his face did shine as the sun: and his garments became white as snow," according to the Vulgate, or "as light," according to the Greek text.

This dazzling brightness which emanated from His whole Body was produced by an interior shining of His Divinity. False Judaism had rejected the Messias, and now true Judaism, represented by Moses and Elias, the Law and the Prophets, recognized and adored Him, while for the second time God the Father proclaimed Him His only-begotten and well-loved Son. By this glorious manifestation the Divine Master, who had just foretold His Passion to the Apostles (Matthew 16:21), and who spoke with Moses and Elias of the trials which awaited Him at Jerusalem, strengthened the faith of his three friends and prepared them for the terrible struggle of which they were to be witnesses in Gethsemani, by giving them a foretaste of the glory and heavenly delights to which we attain by suffering.

May your hearts be transfigurated today for the glorie of God! Have a wonderful Sunday everyone!

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Day Dream

Have you ever thought what it would be like to sour with the astronauts in space? Well
if you wont to let you day dreams soar go to this sight and fasten your seat belt!

Our current technology is mind bending if you wont to spend a little time on the web searching. You can travel the stars, look at virtual street maps all over the world. Webcam in real time from across the and around the world. You can see live animals in Africa, watch the waves lash the shore in Florida or almost any where.

We truly live in a marvelous time! Expand your mind and try something new today. Have a great weekend everyone.

Friday, March 10, 2006

Bone of my Bone flash of My flash

By the time the Lord made woman,

He was into his sixth day of working overtime..
An angel appeared and said,
"Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her?
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic,
have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable
and able to run on diet coke and leftovers,
have a lap that can hold four children at one time,
have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart
-and she will do everything
with only two hands."

The angel was astounded at the requirements.
"Only two hands!? No way!
And that's just on the standard model?
That's too much work for one day.
Wait until tomorrow to finish."

But I won't," the Lord protested.
"I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart.
She already heals herself when she is sick
AND can work 18 hour days."

The angel moved closer and touched the woman.
"But you have made her so soft, Lord."

"She is soft," the Lord agreed,
"but I have also made her tough.
You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."

"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.

The Lord replied,
"Not only will she be able to think,
she will be able to reason and negotiate."

The angel then noticed something,
and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek.
"Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model.
I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."

"That's not a leak,"
the Lord corrected,
"that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.

The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy,
her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love,
her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impressed.
"You are a genius, Lord.
You thought of everything!
Woman is truly amazing."

And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness,
love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry..
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors..
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideals.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

I received this via e-mail yesterday and thought all might enjoy it. I will be the first to admit that a womans work is never done! I supose that's why she was given the gift of child birth that her work might continue!

Thursday, March 09, 2006

The Reat of The Story

> Our Life Explained...
> On the first day, God created the dog and
> said: "Sit all day by the door of your house and
> bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this,
> I will give you a life span of twenty years." The
> dog said: "That's a long time to be barking. How
> about only ten years and I'll give you back the
> other ten?"
> So God agreed.
> On the second day, God created the monkey
> and said: "Entertain people, do tricks, and make
> them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year
> life span." The monkey said: "Monkey tricks for
> twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform.
> How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"
> And God agreed.
> On the third day, God created the cow and
> said: "You must go into the field with the farmer
> all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves,
> and give milk to support the farmer's family. For
> this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."
> The cow said: "That's kind of a tough life you want
> me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and
> I'll give back the other forty?"
> And God agreed again.
> On the fourth day, God created man and said:
> "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For
> this, I'll give you twenty years." But man said:
> "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my
> twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the
> monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back;
> that makes eighty, okay?"
> "Okay," said God, "You asked for it."
> So that is why the first twenty years we
> eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next
> forty years we slave in the sun to support our
> family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks
> to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten
> years, we sit on the front porch and bark at
> everyone.
> Life has now been explained to you.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Red Hill School Hastings UK

I love beautiful old buildings. This one was build in 1612 to house the aristocrats lunatics! Then became a school house. The pic. and story comes from a friends blog in Hastings. The school websight shows reunions at the school from the thirties up through the nineties.

Just think the building is older than our country. I marvel at some of the pics. from Europe of the old buildings and their color schema. I have seen so many fine old buildings torn down case being our church here in town that's slated to be torn down and rebuild this year! The building is only forty-years old.

I wasd born and raised in a small town NE of T-town. Jonesboro, a suburb of Bessemer Al. My first school has been torn down. My second school in Bessemer was abandon many years ago. My third school Bessemer High School was sold to a National church organization as a state conference center. I have driven by these schools and recollected the time I spent there. Good and bad but part of me that I will take to the grave.

Speaking of Grave! I had my Doc. Appointment yesterday and was given a clean slate on all the test they have ran! Yahoo!!! Well not quite. The acid reflux problem hast damaged my voice box! I have become horse and at time loose my voice all together. My doc. Was all up set abut this. He's is giving me a strong regiment of meads to try to clear it up in three weeks or I will have to go to a throat specialist! Darn... Almost a clean bill of health.

I have lost thirty pounds and work out at the gem three times a week. I have started walking, carrying my clubs at the golf course. This is something I haven't done in years. I feel pretty good for an old FART

My grandpa use to say son, your health is like a bank account. You get out only what you put in!

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Winter paradise

I would love to say this is my good by to winter but I no we could still have some cold weather. As a child growing up in Alabama March was always a teaser for spring. I remember days that I throw a fit for mom to let me go swimming! The weather would be so warm and sunny.

Also March was always kite flying month. The wind would blow the kites a mile high. One time I got my hands on three balls of kite string and put the kite out of sight. The good lord must have wanted that kite cause I never saw it again. It was a thrill to see it disappear into the sky!

My golf group is getting togather this morning. We have a 10:00am T-time. So I will be thinking of all you work lock lobers today! :-). We have had a lot of rain and the golf course has been wet and muddy. Great excuse to start walking while the weather isn't to hot. When it gets 80* plus we ride. It just takes to much out of you to walk.

Have a great day everyone. I hope the weather is nice where ever you are!

My grandpa use to say son, warm days and golf are like a chicken sitting on eggs. You no something is going to hatch!

Monday, March 06, 2006

Monday, March 06, 2006

Meme five weird things

1. In the morning I have a glass of ice water with my coffee.

2. I take my dog Ginger almost every where I go.

3. I keep my hair short so I dont have to comb it.

4. I don't shave every day.

5. I am cativated by red headed wemen!

The rules:

Once you've been tagged you must make an entry that contains a list of 5 Weird Habits of Yourself. When you are finished, you must tag 5 other people by listing their Xanga ID in your post. Then you must go to their Site and make a comment stating that they are tagged and have them come to your site for the rules.

Let's see....I tag:

Brent, Brinda, Joan, Karen, and Joe Cool

Sunday, March 05, 2006

My Room Additions

New TV & DVD/VCR Recorder T is showing R with brats in his hair!

Throw Rug Head board

Golf Bed Spread

19th Hole Sign

Box Frames and pictures

I worked out back yesterday day and as usual I over did it! I wasn't a happy camper all evening. I have some strong pain reliever that I use as a have to and man did I have too! It would be hard to pinpoint where I wasn't hurting. My brain cells some how want except the fact that I'm not a young man anymore!

After church last night M and I stopped by to see Paul. He is still not feeling good after his hospital scare with the bleeding. He doesn't look well at all. I pray he will be alright.

I no most of you don't watch golf but this weekend match with tiger and Phil battling it out is exciting! I saw Tiger hit one of his rare slices into the lake and it looked just like I had hit the ball! LOL! Today will prove to be an exciting conclusion! Have a great Sunday everyone!

Friday, March 03, 2006

Da Vinci No. 9

Da Vinci’s fascination with the sea spurred many designs for aquatic exploration. His diving suit was made of leather, connected to a snorkel made of cane and a bell that floated at the surface. Proving the artist was also practical, the suit included a pouch the diver could urinate in.

Geez, anither fast day! My wife took our daughter to the emergincie room this morning! They were there for five hours.They say she has a severe Sinus infection! Would have never guessd that. Anyway more medication on top of what she is alrady taking.

My friend P. came home from the hospital today! They had to cortize where he was bleeding. Every thing checked negetive, that was good news.

One of my golf buddies and I had brekfust this morning and worked at the church trimming. It want be long and the moore bragade will start. I did cut on the side and in front of the church before I left. The darn weeds were up eight to ten inches high.

The beat goes on at Durel!...
MIAMI -- Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson resumed their duel at opposite ends of Doral on Thursday, and the outcome didn't change.

Woods was still one shot better.

In a balmy start to the Florida swing, Woods again reached the 603-yard 12th hole in two shots and ran off a string of birdies along the back nine of the Blue Monster for an 8-under 64 and a one-shot lead over Mickelson and four others in the Ford Championship at Doral.

"This guy Tiger seems to play well every day, every week," Mickelson said. "I'm just trying to keep pace. I'm trying to maybe have another shot at dueling out with him on Sunday, and I'm glad that he's playing well. I've got to do my part and stay with him."

Last but foemost when my son came home he decovered his trailer had been broken into! He had quite a bit of change saved in large bottles, credit cards, and checks were all taken! The police were out for several hours. They got quite a few finger prints! As much as I hate to say it, my granddaughter is a prime suspect! What's the old saying "There's always something!

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Da Vinci"s 10 best Ideas

Was it a ploy to thwart Renaissance copycats peeking at his notes, or just a way to avoid the inky mess of writing left-handed? Whatever his motives, Da Vinci sure liked mirror writing: most of his journals are scrawled in reverse.

There has been so much in the news this past year on Da Vinci, I thought I would give you a peek at this amazing man and some of his work starting with number 10 down.

Yesterday was like a blur! I had to take M to the dentist for her braces to be adjusted. Then her mom to the doctor. My grand son had court for parole violation. He made out alright. They gave him three more years of probation. He could have gone to jail!

One of my best friends was hospitalized! He had a colenoptimisie a week ago and they took a biopsy and had to go to the hospital for bleeding. He will be ok but what a scare. I have lost one friend to colon cancer.

Everywhere I went on the net yesterday someone was sick or asking for prayers for someone. I think the screwed up weather we have had this year has a lot to do with all the sickness this year. I read also that the mild weather has created a boom in the tree betel and a lot of forest will be divested.

By now I'm sure you have heard that they have found a cat with the bird flue! This virus is spreading all over. Millions of birds have been destroyed because of it.

What's the origin of the term "French kiss"?
A French kiss may feel like a sexy maneuver (especially to hormonal teens), but it's not very romantic to watch. Ever witness a couple playing tonsil hockey in public? Unless someone's going off to war the next morning, there's really no excuse.

So how did this slobbery smooch get its name? As far as we can tell, it stems from the stereotype that the French are a morally casual people., which specializes in these sorts of questions, says the term dates from at least the 1920s but doesn't know exactly who coined the phrase. The site goes on to draw parallels to other adult-only phrases like "pardon my French" and "French postcards." Ooh la la! says a lot of the same things (i.e., the phrase comes from uptight prudes who believed the French were promiscuous). Several sites and dictionaries mention "soul kiss" as a synonym. Apparently the act of sticking your tongue into the mouth of another person is so intense, your souls intertwine. Home, we must be doing it wrong.

My grandpa use to say son, smooching in public is like taking a leak at a red light. Someone could get ran over!

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

"You Think You Have Troubles"

After growing web feet from all the rain, the temp hit 73* yesterday and will be in the upper 70s today. I took advantage of the nice weather and played golf. I have to admit the best thing we did was show up! I was in every sand trap and bush on the course! LOL!

Some how my brain cells can't except the idea that you want a low score not a high one!
I forgot my camera and saw a lot of interesting sights. The course is washed out pretty bad from all the rain. Deep erosion left some seanic sights.

One high light for the day we watched a local female sports doctor do her thing...

Two women were playing golf. One teed off, and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands together, at his groin, fell to the ground, and proceeded to roll around in agony.

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize. "Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist, and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me," she told him.

"Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes," the man replied.

He was still in pain, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands together in his groin. But, she persisted, and he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away, and laid them to the side. She loosened his pants, and put her hands inside. She began to massage him, and then asked, "How does that feel?"

He replied, "It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell."

My grandpa use to say son, a smile a day wont buy you a bell of hey but it will sure make you feel better!